aterat | One Fall And One Less Bear

But it's... weighty box. Nida bites his lip and shakes his head.

"I think I'll probably get more anxious about it if you leave it that long, Ig," he admits. It's not that easy to give that to the other man.

He'd just set it down when he heard Nida speak. The advisor felt his shoulders slump and he turned around to face the man with his hands behind him on the edge of the table. The silence was kind of eerie and he could feel the weight of whatever was contained in that box.

Green eyes looked up and gazed into the other's eyes. "Shall we open it together then?" Ignis was really trying here because his lover looked ready to fall over.

"Together?" Nida asks, moving a step closer. "It's a gift for you, not for me. And it's a small box. How do we do it together?"

Now that they don't find good ways to work together already.

"We can unwrap it together." Ignis offered with something of a smile. "It does seem to be rather important since you informed me what it has to do with." And that was really important in the advisor's eyes. "So it doesn't seem quite right to be here by myself to unwrap it or to do it alone."

Turning around briefly to retrieve the box, he met Nida the rest of the way and began to unwrap it, leaving plenty of room for his lover to help. And he wasn't going to admit that his hands were shaking.

At least it's clearly not a ring box. Too big for that. But he reaches out and helps with taking the bow off and the paper and yeah. just a little box. How interesting.

His hands are steady because he forces them to be as he takes the lid off the box to reveal the pendant and the silver chain.

Ignis let Nida take the lead on this and moved his hands back and out of the way as the pendant and chain came into view. The pendant itself was a beautiful green and his eyes curiously looked at it. Carefully he lifted it from the box and held it in the palm of his hand, uncertain as to what this meant.

"It's quite lovely." the advisor announced, smiling as he looked it at. "The design is something I've never seen before." But he still couldn't quite make the connection that was intended because it was a necklace. He could read into what the necklace meant perhaps, that Nida wanted to have the other he wore replaced, but Ignis didn't think that was the case, so he just studied it a bit more, trying to ascertain its meaning.

"Yeah," Nida agrees, not even noticing the card explaining the pendant fall out of the lid as he sets it aside. "I..."

Again he licks his lips, nervous.

"We said no terms on this, no string. I think... I think I want to try strings, if that's something you'd be okay with. You and me, sorta, you know, dating?"

Geez, he's horrible at this. He can seduce guys, but asking for something serious? Difficult.

Green eyes had caught something falling, but he didn't pay it any mind as Nida seemed to grow even more nervous. And then the words coming at him caught him quite off guard. He truly hadn't expected anything like this and didn't know what to do. So he just listened and his eyes opened a bit wider behind his glasses.

Pushing his spectacles up the bridge of his nose, Ignis finally met the other's gaze and his head cocked to the side a little. "I can tell you're serious by the look in your eyes because they're always quite talkative." A little smile accompanied that statement, because that was how he learned to gauge Nida anymore due to the other's expressive dark eyes. But then the advisor grew serious and his tone softened. "But if you wish to court, I'd like us to be sure. There's no wish to rush this if we need more time."

And yes he said 'us' and 'we' because that was how he looked at it.

Were they? His eyes? Damn, Ignis was one of few how could say things like that about Nida's eyes. But he can't help but smile at the idea of 'courting'.

"My flame, it's not that complicated. I don't mean we have to court. But I wouldn't mind calling you mine, and maybe being yours for as long as moves us. As long as this world allows."

He loved seeing Nida smile, especially at a critical time like this. But then Ignis wasn't sure what the rest meant. Wasn't that what dating was? Or did he have it all wrong somehow? Being each other's, was there another word for it?

Not sure what to say, Ignis looked down and his eyes went over to the table for a moment. And that was when he saw the paper. Thinking it was some sort of note, he reached over with his free hand and read it, realizing it explained the pendant's meaning.

And then he reread it twice to make sure his eyes weren't playing tricks. Then he read it a third time, even slower. The advisor's jaw clenched and tears pricked at his eyes. "If you don't mean us to court..do you care to explain this?" The paper was held out to Nida and he didn't try to hide his face.

Dating didn't always mean full on intentions on trying to win someone to some day marrying them. That's definitely way too deep for Nida to not get super nervous at the implication.

He sees Ignis go for the paper and stares at him, confused, especially as tears started to form. What? When the paper is handed over Nida reads it. And starts to blush. Wow, that's...

"Woah, uh... I chose jade because back home it has meaning. Wisdom, and nurturing, and guidance. And it would go with your eyes. Raimon showed me a few things in different styles to help me figure something out, and asked me why I wanted it, who for. And..."

And he told the guy. Who had jumped ahead a lot. But...

"But the meaning fits, doesn't it? We're two people, two cultures, and there are feelings here, at least on my side. So maybe it's a bit hopeful and reaching but I would still like you to accept it. Wear it or don't next to your other necklace, I... Just needed to give you something for all you give me."

Patiently Ignis listened to the explanation behind the necklace. "I have to wonder what it was that you said to make him choose something like this." His eyes went to the necklace and silently agreed it would match his eyes.

But his attention was taken again when Nida started asking his question. And he'd already determined that he wasn't exactly sure what that made them or where they stood with each other. All Ignis could pinpoint was that it was 'something beyond friends'. His lover hadn't outright denied anything that had been written on the paper, but..well it was just confusing and he had to stop overthinking it. He knew that much, because Nida had been through an awful lot.

So the advisor just smiled, tucking his confused thoughts away. "I think it has a beautiful meaning. You've put a lot of effort into acquiring such a prize and I accept it." He looked back down at it briefly, realizing this was why the other had been so shaken then brought his eyes back to Nida's. "Will you help me put it on?"

Perhaps Ignis really didn't understand it, because he worries that the man doesn't get it. That this was meant to be the true start of something more than just a friends with benefits. He moves forward and takes the necklace, unclasping the chain.

"You don't mind then? That I did this? That I want to be with you in places more than just ending up in and around our beds?"

When the necklace left his hand, Ignis suddenly felt like he'd lost his anchor. But then Nida was unclasping it, prepared to put it around his neck, just as he'd requested.

It was hard to figure out how to answer the other because Ignis had zero experience. He could only go with what little he'd read. Relationships never really entered his mind because he didn't 'have' time for them due to his whole life being wrapped up in Noctis per King Regis' request to 'look after my son'. And Noct had been ordered to marry Lady LunaFreya to ensure peace for the kingdom though Ignis had no doubt there were some feelings there due to them keeping up with their book correspondence for years through Umbra.

So it had all been one sided on his part and for some reason that slammed into him right now along with how much Nida must've suffered and been so lonely.

Still, he smiled against the pain and it was hard. "No, I don't mind at all. It was rather thoughtful and kind of you to think of me." He was really touched because everyone just takes his presence for granted though he doesn't mind. That was what he'd signed up for after all.

It crossed his mind to add 'and the battlefield' to his lover's list but he passed on the thought. Instead green eyes looked at the man and there was a small bit of confusion. "Darling, you're always welcome wherever I am."

And Ignis was so sure he was way overthinking this.

It takes a bit to keep his hands from shaking as he puts the necklace around Ignis's neck and clasps it. Once that is done he wraps his arms around Ignis's waist and hides his face in Ignis's shoulder. Don't look at him. He's not ready to show how much his heart was racing. But perhaps Ignis could feel it.

"Since that first weekend, I have found I cannot stop thinking of you. I want to be at your side. I want to be yours. I am fragile and broken, and when I'm around you I don't feel like that. I want to be with you. I feel more alive than I have in so long with you. And even when all we're doing is cleaning my apartment or sitting and having books and coffee."

Ignis immediately lifted a hand to touch the necklace to his chest when he heard the clasp click into place. It made him smile to feel the cool green stone on bare skin but suddenly Nida was holding onto him. He drew a slightly hitched breath and wrapped his arms around the man, knowing something had changed or at least deepened between them.

And before he had a chance to ask what was what wrong, the man in his arms started talking and the advisor listened very closely to every last word. There was a smile that Nida couldn't see and Ignis held on a little tighter. "Then be by my side and stay there for as long as you wish. And if you are mine, than I am yours in return."

Well, that makes Nida happy to hear. He grins against Ignis's chest and then lets his arms slide down to more around Ignis's waist. Because then he can pick up, which he does, and, and he spins the other man around just a bit in all of his joy at that declaration.

The arms go down to his waist and the next thing Ignis realized was that he was being lifted. It felt a little odd that he was being picked up but that of course was due to no one doing that back home. The advisor found himself laughing but that was because of the merry expression on the other's face.

When he was put down, the advisor placed his hands on either side of the man's face. "Your happiness shows in your beautiful expressive eyes darling." A smile appeared and he briefly kissed his mate, whispering against his lips. "And you're not the only one here with feelings. I thought you might wish to be aware of that."

Beautiful, expressive eyes. Oh Ignis, if you keep saying things like that, his heart will truly belong to you. If it didn't already. But the declaration is what really gets him. So much. Wow. He releases Ignis so he can instead get his fingers into Ignis's hair and pulls him into a fuller kiss. And when his lungs ache because he needs to breathe, he lets the other man go, unable to help the tears in his eyes.

His heart hasn't felt so good in so long. Like all the aches were filled up all over again.

"Thank you. I... I wouldn't want to pressure you, but a one way thing would have broken me again."

He wasn't expecting Nida's swift reaction but it was wonderful to experience. The ferocity of the other's kiss really took Ignis by surprise but it was just so delightful. A muffled moan came out in short order with the fingers now in his hair and he just melted into their kiss. Whatever this was, the advisor simply wanted more of it.

All too soon it seemed Nida was pulling back and he was slightly alarmed at the tears that he saw, until he heard what was being said. That made Ignis smile. "It's not all one sided darling, it never was."

And that was the truth.

"You just keeping calling me that, my flame," he says, smiling so fondly at the other man. This was good. Yeah, this was good.

"If I don't shut up, I'm going to say such silly things, and I worry I'll make you feel awkward," Nida admits after a moment, but he can't wipe the fond gaze away.

Ignis blushed. "It seems as if you've come up with a nickname for me as well." He liked it, it fit. But the part he really liked was the whole word 'my' in front of it. Of course he wouldn't say such a thing because he wasn't sure how well it would go over. But Nida seemed to be radiating such joy which was quite the difference from a few of their conversations that he could recall.

There was a small smile and a shake of the head. "I do believe I would rather like to hear them, regardless." Someone expressing any feelings for him was pretty damn unheard of. So he was willing to venture into some untested waters just to hear what Nida had to say. It might even give him some more clarity and insight.

"But it's up to you." Because Ignis wasn't going to try and make the man do anything he wasn't comfortable with.

"It's not a nickname, it's an affection," Nida counters. And he likes it. It will likely stick around since the man doesn't seem to dislike it.

How does he even say this? How does he risk it? Nida takes a deep breath and takes a step away. Just one.

"I've been broken a long time, I lost hope in a lot of things. You're changing that."

For a moment Ignis just smiled, and while he probably looked like a dork but he didn't care. This was important, to have a sense of belonging, which was something he hadn't realized he needed until this moment.

But then Nida stepped away and the smile stopped and Ignis fought himself not to reach out. It bothered not him to do so, but he didn't. So he kept his hands at his side and listened as the other spoke. And it felt like his heart was breaking all over again to hear what the man said at first. He could only imagine everything the other had been through and it just hurt.

At the end though, there was hope, and Ignis seized it. He closed the distance and kissed Nida, trying his best just to tenderly hold onto him.

Ignis moves and Nida doesn't back away. Instead he embraces the man and meets the kiss with a softness that cannot be denied. This? This deserves softness.

And when this one passes he starts another. And another, quicker. Until he can pull back just enough to rest his forehead against Ignis's.

"You delight me."

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject