aterat | One Fall And One Less Bear

As he moved up over Nida, Ignis smiled and removed his glasses to the bedside stand. "If that's impressed you darling I should do it far more often." And the advisor made a mental note to do just that. Besides, Nida took care to show off for him, so the least he could do was return it in kind. Besides, the adorable gaze he'd been on the receiving end of while holding his lover had thrilled him to no end.

He leaned over his mate and gave a few reassuring kisses, linking their fingers when he received a silent permission to do so. He had a plan as to how he wanted to do this, but knowing them whenever he made plans Nida had a few wrenches. But he could deal with that.

Ignis too wanted to say a lot of things, words he always kept close to his heart, but he might ruin things. So he stuck to kissing along the other's jaw and slowly made his way down the other's neck, squeezing the hands placed so trustingly under his own.

At first, Nida's confused by the hands moving into his own, by the tangle of their fingers. He makes no move to stop them, because why should he? If this is what is getting Ignis off, he wants it. But...

But the more it goes on, the more that grip feels good. Grounding. Anchoring. His heart doesn't know what to make of it. Good thing his thoughts were elsewhere, following the line of Ignis's kisses, each one punctuated by a small sigh from Nida.

It's like a day at the spa, but intimate. He likes it.

This is far more than a claiming that Ignis wants to do. After hearing what he heard tonight, and seeing the almost childlike and helpless expression on Nida's face, it broke Ignis. If he could take every last bit of his healing technique and use it to mend Nida's heart and never be able to use it again he would without hesitation or reservation.

And that's what this was for too. This was about healing as well as making love. If the advisor could make love to his mate's very soul he would do that too. Hopping worlds and having to start over repeatedly was bad enough. But to hear about an abusive mate on top of it, that was it.

He pulled up from kissing Nida's neck and gently rubbed their noses together. "What do you say to us getting a little more comfortable with our clothes decidedly off?"

Oh Ignis, his heart feels too large already. So damn large. He wants to touch the guy. But their fingers are tangled.

"Yes," he says, his voice soft and half breathless. "Yes please, Ignis."

He doesn't know what is happening, but he's excited for it.

Oh how that soft breathless voice left him in delightful shivers. He smiled and slowly let go of Nida's hands. And no sooner had his own moved to start removing his lover's shirt, he immediately missed the warmth and the trust that he'd felt.

Knowing it could happen again kept him going and he always liked when Nida removed his clothing, so here he was returning the care and the tenderness he always felt when it was done to him. It was half a thought to leave them half clothed, but once he really got started he wouldn't want clothes to inconvenience them.

The clothes would really be an issue later, and Nida? Nida just smiled up at his lover for now, enjoying giving control over to the other.

"You seem like a man who really knows what wants tonight."

As Ignis lifted the other's shirt from his chest, Ignis leaned in to kiss the man. "Well in this case, that would be you." He tried to take the top off slowly of course so that both of them could savour it.

Once that was accomplished, he started to undo the buttons on his own shirt. But every few moments he would lean in to kiss Nida or lift one of his lover's hands to kiss gently before returning to the task at hand.

Finally he had it unbuttoned and went to undo the buttons at his wrists in preparation for taking the article of clothing off and be freed of it. So his green eyes fixed on the other man and he smiled.

"Have I ever told you how beautiful and fascinating I think you are?"

It’s already so much, that even the slow, deliberate way that Ignis was treating him in just undressing Nida was growing to be too much. By the time the compliment fell from Ignis’s lips, Nida was shaking, just a little.

Not enough to see. Definitely enough for someone so close to feel.

“No,” he answers dutifully, “not in as many words.”

"Then I shan't be so remiss anymore in making sure you know that full well." He smiled. "And often." Leaning in for another kiss before he was set to remove Nida's pants his hand went to the side of his lover's face.

And that's when he felt it. Ignis of course immediately worried but tried to remain calm and kept his eyes trained on the dark ones that sometimes the advisor felt held his soul in them.

"Nida..what's wrong darling?"

If Ignis's hands weren't on his face, Nida would be reaching up to wipe away his tears. How could he even... how can he explain it.

"I don't know, you're just being so soft and gentle and... I don't even know what is happening. But it feels so good."

He'd seen the glassy eyed look and that made Ignis worry. Nida was upset, and his first reaction was that had to fix it. The reply didn't help his mind ask about four questions tumbling one after the other but they didn't pass his lips.

In turn the advisor just smiled and debated for a moment before leaning in to kiss the man again. And when he pulled back, he gently wiped at the tears. Okay, these were good ones, so all was well.

Those questions came back but he pushed them away and spoke softly, still looking into those amazing dark depths. "I'm very happy to hear that darling."

So much tenderness, and he feels like he's going to break. How can this be so good? How can Ignis make him feel like this by doing nothing more than taking his time.

"I'm sorry. I know this isn't attractive."

That comment worried Ignis and he shook his blonde head. "Darling, listen to me. I personally think you are incredibly beautiful. And all that you've been through has made you who you are today. So please don't ever think I don't find you attractive at all, no matter what the circumstances are."

He kept the man's face in his hands, but sat a little flatter on the bed. His heart hurt to hear Nida to even say such a thing. And while it hurt for the man there was a distant anger, at the people who dared treat this wonderful man so badly and had broken him.

But it was the other said, Nida had those cracks just like the pottery. And Ignis found him so incredibly beautiful no matter how broken or flawed. Hopefully he could help to heal those cracks completely because the man deserved so much good in his life. And if Ignis was the one to do it, he would do his very best.

Oh, Ignis had a damn good chance of being the one to do it. As for Nida, he was just ashamed that all the confidence and expertise he normally offered in bed felt so... useless right now.

"Hyne above," Nida whispers as he looks up at the other, "you're too good for me. And I'm too greedy and selfish to ask you to go."

At least he didn't want to give Ignis up just because he felt he wasn't good enough for the other man. It made him want to cling all the tighter, maybe get dragged up to his level.

Ignis shook his head as he looked at Nida at hearing that he was too good. But the last part of it stunned him because he didn't want to go anywhere. Wasn't that the point of a relationship? He wanted to be there every day no matter if either or both had a good or bad one. It was who he was, to be there no matter what, always trying to help. Maybe his tenure as a royal advisor from the age of six wasn't exactly relationship material, but having been on the road and knowing Noct and the others as long as he did, well he was definitely someone who was big on longevity.

Thinking of leaving Nida made Ignis want to cry but he tried to hide it. He had to be the strong one here because his lover needed him. "Please..if I can ever only ask one thing of you..it's to never ask me to leave you. Please don't send me away."

"Never," Nida agrees. And, well, in for a penny and with his whole heart swelling with how he's being treated, he might as well say it.

"I would never send you away, my love. I think I'd forget to breathe if you weren't at my side."

This time Ignis pulled Nida into his arms for a hug. He needed it himself and wrapped his arms around him. He'd been afraid that if he tried to kiss Nida, he might cry and that wasn't what he wanted to do in front of him. Besides, he'd already done that once. But in his eyes his lover could cry all he wanted to and Ignis would never think any ill of him.

The advisor's jaw clenched as he recalled that tear filled face, the one that thought he was unattractive. Banishing that from his thoughts, he chose to focus on a positive thought though he didn't let go of his current hold.

So he smiled a little and spoke in a low voice. "Would you mind terribly if I asked you to repeat that name you just called me?"

"If you want to hear it again, you're welcome to, my love. Because that's what you are," Nida answers, his voice soft, perhaps even nervous. "I love you. You leave me burning and breathless."

All he'd expected was to hear the name again. So he smiled and hugged his lover a little closer, grateful to hear those words come out of Nida's mouth.

He'd been just about to say thank you but then he heard those other words. And that's when it felt like his heart just melted. He took a hitched breath trying to keep it all in and be strong, but soon Ignis found that he couldn't do it as he felt tears silently slide down his cheeks.

He was so joyful so these too were good tears as his grip on Nida increased.

Nida wants to laugh. His hand comes up to cup Ignis's cheek.

"Seems like we're both a mess right now," Nida observes. "Love does that, right? Leaves you feeling all soft and weak?"

Once that's said he leans up to kiss Ignis. Just let him kiss the man. They deserve all of this.

"That appears to be the case." Ignis finally admitted, pulling back a little bit to clean his traitorous face. He couldn't even remember the last time anyone said that to him and he didn't want to try to recall that right now anyhow. Now was for Nida though of course as he once thought, he would make plans and Nida would come along and ruin them (even if in a very unexpected way like this) somehow.

The best part (or the worst part) was that he would happily let him do it every time.

Like with this situation. He planned on waiting to say those words, but the proverbial cat was out of the bag so to speak for both of them. Still, Ignis couldn't look at the other right now because he was still trying to stuff all of it back in, trying to get a hold of himself.

And then that kiss touched his lips and he found himself sinking and surrendering quietly into Nida's warmth, comfort and love.

Sometimes the words just need said. Sometimes you don't have forever to say them. So Nida just got them out there.

Helped that the kiss was great. He does relax a bit, though, and when the kiss ends he smiles up at Ignis.

"Sorry if I derailed you."

He finished wiping his eyes with a smile. "It's completely alright. And about par for the course I believe." He leaned down to kiss Nida again briefly, just to feel that contact again.

There was a big intake of breath and he picked up his lover's hand to place a kiss to the back of it. "And here I simply planned on a slow gentle evening of eating your ass with a spoon so to speak. Yet there you go and make it even more enchanting."

He leaned down for another kiss and smiled after only slightly pulling back. "Thank you darling."

Nida's definitely blushing a bit.

"Eat my ass with a what now?" he asks, shocked. How interesting. He's very interested, confused, and aroused of course.

But mostly he's smiling and waiting for all of what he might be given. If Ignis is still up to it.

Ignis let out a small laugh. "It's an expression the lads used back home. I always took it to literally mean that they wanted to eat someone's ass and The spoon is simply just a metaphor."

He smiled. "However should we ever be in public and I'm admiring your ass, I should always carry a spoon with me so you know where my thoughts are." Of course that spoon would be produced discretely but if Nida saw it, he would know.

The advisor's still definitely up for all of their things of course. But he had to get rid of his shirt yet, which he started doing.

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