aterat | When the wolves wear the wool

Entry tags:

When the wolves wear the wool

Who; Illyana + Mono
What; A friendly display of demonic limbo.
Where; Grey building then perhaps elsewhere
When; Backdated to end of August
Warnings;None so far, will update if any are needed

There was no denying the fact that Illyana rarely thought things through. Well, that wasn't entirely true. Recent history had proven that she was more than capable of methodically planning out every detail that could bring about the end of personal tormenters. Perhaps it was more accurate to say she didn't always think through the consequences of the things she said. Or did. One could assume it was just because she didn't care about said consequences and they wouldn't be entirely wrong. One could also just assume that she said and did things for the amusement in the moment and didn't think beyond that. Those people wouldn't be wrong either.

Either or, it all lead to the same result: moments like these. Moments where she'd said something and now found herself feeling strange about it. Like, perhaps, she was questioning whether or not it was entirely appropriate to suggest she could show someone as young as Mono a hell dimension. He couldn't be much older than she had been when Belasco had taken her away to Limbo. Was it really right to expose him to the place? Then again it had seemed like he had seen more than his share of scary places. Plus Limbo was hers now. It was still a hell dimension filled with imps and other demons but they followed her and some places...some places were not as bad as others. It would never be as amazing as Storm's garden but it was something that had life in it. That was more than she had ever accomplished before.

Perhaps it was best to leave it as his choice. If he wished to see then she could show him. Choice was something she had never been given after all. It only seemed right to give a choice to another. She teleported to the common room of his build, the disc appearing first with the slight scent of brimstone before the rest of her body appeared starting with her black combat boots, moving up to her black and red dress, to the large silver ankh around her neck, and ending with her awkward smiling face. In her hand she had two cinnamon pretzels still in their wraps.

"I stopped for snacks." IT was an apology for being late. At least as much of an apology as she ever gave.

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Hope for the best and expect the worst… That sounded about right to the kid. At least it was better than being disappointed when things didn’t go the way you wanted all the time.

Mono shrugged a little at her question, shaking his head. “No, I dunno where I got them…” He squinted a little, trying to even remember if he always had them or if he just had gotten them one day. Some things were so fuzzy… But he was pretty sure it just happened, “I think I kinda just got them one day… Bad stuff happened at the orphanage I was in, and I ran… and I think I kinda fell into the TV and fell out somewhere else.” Then he just kept running, he supposed. Feeling a constant, strange draw to the televisions… Different from the one the viewers felt… And a strange need to get to the signal tower.

“Coming here helps stop the emotions?” That was an odd idea, but sounded like a convenient sort of thing for a place to do… It made him wonder if he’d ever figure how to stop them if he needed to. Probably not the healthiest idea for a kid to have, just… not dealing with emotions… But it was a strange world and sometimes grasping onto something easier was appealing.

Mono looked at the buildings again, eyes drifting to the castle that was Illyana’s… He’d definitely never seen a castle outside of books before. “Yeah, all the buildings are kinda… broken and droopy in the Pale City.” They were almost… leaning towards the signal tower, the one building that stood tall. “You have a whole castle? That’s neat. I only ever seen them in books before.” He added quickly, so she would know that he was impressed by the castle.

It was very hard to not be distracted by the imps, and hard to not answer them when they started to question each other or him… He didn’t have anything, at least not that he could give… “Sorry, I don’t got anything interesting.” He mumbled to the group before Illayana told him to try ignoring them. Right, not supposed to talk to them… So the little creatures would have to do without conversation or gifts if they expected them. “Um… Okay, I’d like to see the castle if you wanna go there?” Obviously never having seen a real castle, he also had never been in one before.

"Interesting," she said with a little quirk of her head. "Where I am from our powers usually manifest around puberty. Some happen before, though that is more rare. Perhaps yours triggered early due to your circumstances. Though, we do not come from the same world so rules are different." Not that rules seemed consistent most of the time in her own world. Things happened and for the most part mutants just attempted to deal with it the best they could. Which was often far from ideal ways.

"Limbo is...complicated. But yes. It helps to stop emotions and confusion that comes from them. It is where I escaped to when my brother would not stop looking for me." She looked down at him and gave a weird lopsided smile. "Limbo is a demon dimension. The longer one spends here the more attune to it's demonic influences they become." Which just meant the more corrupted and demonic they became. It was difficult to have good emotions when one was slowly becoming completely demonic. "Though...I had a teacher once who told me there was balance to be found here. She was able to make parts of this place into a paradise. I have had...limited success." But limited meant she had some! Only recently though and only a tiny area that she was able to keep hidden from the imps and other demons here.

"I suppose your Pale City lives up to it's name then," she said with a smirk. "Wars are often waged here and buildings do not last long. None save the castle. It belongs to the ruler of Limbo. Several others have owned it before me, but I have always managed to take it back."

The shoulders of all the imps slumped in unison and they finally quieted down, though they stayed close to Mono, watching him with big black eyes filled with curiosity and perhaps even a bit of fear. It wasn't often that their master brought others to their home and they couldn't help but wonder what this would mean.

"Try not to be too disappointed." The disc started at their feet again and with the smell of sulfur they teleported to the castle. The room they appeared in was vast with high ceilings with grey stone pillars and ornate bookshelves that seemed to go on forever. It was impossible to tell how many books there were, perhaps thousands or hundreds of thousands even. Somehow it seemed like they just kept going. In the center there was an altar with a large pentagram below it. Ritual daggers adorned the walls, candles floated around everywhere, and in some corners a few books lay out having been left out away from their shelf homes. Runes from various cultures were scratched into the bookshelves and the walls themselves seemed to shimmer from time to time. If he got close enough to some of the pillars he may notice that carved deep into them were tentacles and twisted faces with far too many eyes to be normal. On either side of the altar were large plush couches that were the color of fresh blood. Despite the color they looked surprisingly comfortable for the rest of the room.

"Welcome to my library."

“Yeah?” He tilted his head curiously at that, even if their worlds were very different… “I mostly just keep trying to guess stuff… I keep asking when things sound similar, but it is all so different that I dunno if I’ll ever figure it out.” But it was interesting to think that maybe there were rules at all, like some things were bound to happen according to conditions and such. It made Mono wish there were people in his world he could ask, but unfortunately, there weren’t.

Listening to the explanation about how Limbo worked and how it influenced a person he could sort of understand, or at least a simplified idea of what it did. “I guess people being changed by a world or the things in it makes sense, especially the longer you’re there.” He said thoughtfully, thinking of how the signal had corrupted the pale city and its people over who knew how much time… But the kid was definitely curious about this teacher of Illayana’s. “But you still made some things better? So even if you haven’t done as much as her, you just gotta practice more, right?” At least that’s how it sounded.

He nodded quickly. The pale city definitely was aptly named… “I dunno if that was always the place’s name, but it’s what we all called it. But it is really dull looking. I don’t think it’s even really trying to be a city anymore.” He added with a small shrug of his shoulders, eyes still straying to the imps as they followed quietly. They seemed kind of disappointed, and maybe afraid… Mono was used to seeing fear, and it wasn’t terribly hard to spot. Were they afraid of him?

… Sometimes he was a little afraid of himself and what he could do, so maybe they were right.

But the castle was an interesting subject to focus on, the boy looking at it in the distance. “So you gotta fight to keep it? You must be really strong to always get it back.” He added, sounding more than a little impressed… The boy might be easily impressed though, so it was hard to not shake his head at the idea he might be disappointed. “I’m sure real castles are different from pictures, right? I bet it’s really neat in its own way because it’s a real one.” He babbled a little as the disc started around their feet.

And really, he was right. His eyes darting around the room that they’d appeared in, full of so many books and strange things that he never saw before. “Wow…” He said quietly, still sticking close to the woman. “I think you might have more books than the teacher did at the school…” He commented, head turning this way and that as he tried to look at everything. “But it’s much nicer than that library!” His eyes drifted to the chairs, though, lingering uncertainly for a moment before they returned to the shelves and other things. The chairs were such a bright crimson shade… He wasn’t a fan of the colour red for reasons he wasn’t sure he could explain properly, but it seemed to be very popular with everyone else he met.

"I suppose that is all you can do," she said with a casual shrug. "Guessing took up much of my initial time in this place. Guessing and experimentation." She had found teachers here once upon a time, but good things in Limbo never lasted long. Eventually, like always, she had found herself alone again and had to teach herself the skills she would need to rule.

The chuckle that Illyana let out at his question had a sort of bittersweet quality to it. "Practice makes perfect?" her voice held an odd quality, that still held a hint of bitterness. If only it had been that simple. "Between you and me, I have been trying. Perhaps I could show you." Though she wasn't entirely sure if she actually wanted to show anyone just yet. What if they thought it wasn't that impressive? Compared to what her teacher made it was nothing. Which, in her mind, came from the fact that she was too corrupted to do white magic. That was not something she was ready to admit, though it felt strange to feel so...what was this? Self conscious? Was that what this was? How strange.

"What is it trying to be if not a city?" She tilted her head and gave him a smile and shrug. "There have been several unfortunate attempts at takeovers. Some from it's previous ruler, but those were easy enough to deal with. He is much less impressive than he thinks." That wasn't entirely true, but she hated him enough to take any chance to belittle him. "And some from unintelligent demons who have ambitions higher than their skill. The natives of Limbo are tied to the ruler, but the longer the ruler spends away from Limbo, the less strong that tie becomes. Some gain a bit too much boldness with their new found free will." It was definitely a frustrating aspect to the place.

"The previous ruler of Limbo collected most of these. He was a powerful sorcerer on Earth who gathered many of these during is extremely long life. I suppose his lust for power did provide me with something useful eventually."

“Kinda, yeah… I wish I could go home knowing more stuff, but I don’t know if I will about most things.” He responded with a little shrug, but Illyana seemed to have done all right with guessing and experimenting… So maybe when he went back it would be the same, right?

Mono listened quietly as she shared that she’d really been trying to make a nicer space in this place. Which admittedly left the child feeling more than a little curious. After all, seeing what Illyana had improved upon, seeing what she had changed as she wanted to, was definitely a little more interesting than seeing what the previous ruler of this place had collected and done. Yes, the castle was impressive, but this sounded more so for other reasons. “Yeah…? If you could, I think it’d be neat to see. I bet it’s nice!” Nicer than a room furnished in red by far, in Mono’s opinion.

“I don’t think it knows… Cities are supposed to be busy, right? When I got here, I saw people going places here! They work at the stores, buy food or go to the park and have fun! No one does that anymore in the pale city. It’s just a lot of empty, falling down places and faceless people or things that look like people but don’t really act like people.” He responded after taking a minute to consider what made a city, a city in his opinion. The Pale City was only a city in name in comparison to Aterat.

It sounded kind of difficult to rule a whole world like Limbo, though. “So you gotta go back and forth a lot to make sure this place doesn’t get taken over, huh? You must be really busy.” He commented as she explained how the world worked. Illyana must’ve been pretty strong though, to hang on to this castle or to win it back every time it got taken over… Even if the last ruler wasn’t as strong as he thought he was.

Looking around at the books again, Mono hummed a little. “Yeah, saves you a lot of time looking for things if he already collected them all. I bet you could learn a lot in a place like this if you know where to start.” He added curiously, wondering what kind of stuff was in the books. His reading skills were… Better than one would expect for a kid from a place like he was, but it was definitely not enough when it came to more complex things.

"It would seem we forget most of what we learn here. Pocket dimensions often have strange rules like that," she said with her own shrug to match his. Time seemed to move differently where they were, much like it did in Limbo itself. There was no real way of telling what they would or wouldn't retain though.

"Nice but not quite what it once was," she said with a hint of disappointment in her tone. "We can go if you would like."

"Most cities are busy and loud. It sounds as though something bad happened to your Pale City." And she couldn't help but be at least slightly curious as to what that might have been. It was like this place, mysterious and without the answers they probably needed.

"It's...busy, yes. It would be easier to manage if Limbo wasn't so different from everywhere else." Honestly, the differences made it hard for her to adjust sometimes. She'd spent so much time in Limbo that it was difficult for her to understand how to just be a normal girl. Often she found herself wondering if that were even possible, especially lately. Not that she particularly wanted to admit that. After all she'd told someone back home that she was at least going to try to pretend to be a real girl. The last thing she wanted to do was admit she couldn't even pretend.

At least the last topic was something she could talk about with more confidence. "I spent years here learning all that I could. I needed to learn magic to defeat the former ruler and after..." she shrugged. "Well, knowledge is power. I have to live up to the title of Sorceress Supreme."

Mono looked up at Illyana quickly at that, a look of surprise and… disappointment in his eyes. “We won't… remember all this stuff?” Everything he was learning, and the things he got to experience… It was all going to just… go away? What was the point, then? The child couldn’t help but wonder and be a little… angry. Not at Illyana, no, but at whoever made up such a stupid rule. That wasn’t fair!

The child did try to push the disappointment aside, Illayana was still showing him things… And he really did want to see this other part of Limbo that she’d been working on. Even if it wasn’t as nice as it once was… That just meant she could keep working on it, right? “Yeah? I think I’d still like to see it.”

Something bad had happened in the Pale City, even if he didn’t quite understand the full story behind what that something was. “I think it was the signal that did it… There’s a tower at the center of the city, and it broadcasts to all the tvs. I think people… They watched it too much.” He scrunched his nose a little, trying to think of how to explain what he did know. “There’s a thing that’s behind the tv screens, I saw it when I went in. It’s got a lot of eyes, they followed me… and it’s all… Red and gross? And I think it works with the man in the hat. Because he lives in the tower too, and travels through tvs too.”

An ability too close to Mono’s for his own comfort, if he was being honest. He travelled through tvs too, and it made the child wonder if that meant he could do the other stuff… “But I think that they know what happened to the city, because I think they did it.” He ended with a little shrug, scuffing his foot a little as he glanced around the room again. He needed to get to the tower when he went back. He’d been drawn to it before… But now he needed to get there to save his friend.

“Do you got to do it all alone? What if you had…” He tried to think of the right word. He wanted ‘Assistant’ but instead… “a helper?” He asked, tilting his head a little. Things had been a lot easier in the Pale City once he teamed up with Six. She was better at some things than he was, so they helped each other out. Maybe that’s what the imps were, but they didn’t sound like they were very good at it from what she’d said about them.

He nodded a little, knowledge was power. He just wished he could learn and hang onto it… “Sorceress Supreme sounds really important, but if you already learned all the stuff and you rule this place, then you must already kinda live up to it… Right?” She was very impressive, in the child’s opinion… Though he was also easily impressed by people with abilities who knew how to use them so well.

She gave a nonchalant shrug. "There's no way to be certain I suppose. But, some have said they don't remember when they return." Her eyes took on a hint of sympathy as she looked down at him. "There's no reason to concern yourself with what we don't know." Was that a decent attempt at comfort? She wasn't entirely certain, but perhaps there's something to be said for trying?

"I see. Something with many eyes that's kind of gross? Perhaps your world has things like mine after all." It sounded a lot like what some of the elder gods she'd been tormented by looked like. With each thing he said she grew more curious about what precisely had happened in his world. "Interesting that your abilities appear to be connected to the TV as well." Curious indeed. "And the creature and the man in the hat are after you specifically?"

She tilted her head and then chuckled. "A helper in hell? I have plenty of demonic underlings." Now whether or not they were actually helpful, that was the question there. "Indeed I do already live up to it. There are none that can challenge me in my own domain. There are few that can really challenge me outside of it either anymore." She used to have harder set limitations when she wasn't in Limbo, but things had changed considerably with her deaths and resurrections. Perhaps there was a positive to all of those after all.

"Let's go then if you want to see it. But keep in mind I did warn you it's not much." The portals once again appeared around their feet and when they arrived in a new location this time it was a small garden. The sky was dark with swirls of red, but the garden was lit by some sort of unnatural white light. Illyana hadn't been kidding when she said it was small, the garden itself was no bigger than a living room in a house on the larger side. There were a few large oak trees that looked far more ancient than they probably should that created a canopy over the garden, blocking the view of Limbos more hell-like landscape. A pathway spiraled around them lined with bushes that held flowers that were bright red and yellow, though a few far off on the edges of the garden seem to be withering and touched with a strange blackness.

Mono at least could see the sense in what she said, and maybe understood it was meant to make him feel a little less bad about it all… He still did, of course, because the kid wanted to be ready for when he went back. He nodded a little, frown a little less severe as he finally responded a long moment later. “Yeah… I guess so…” And maybe he could figure out a way to remember things? Just because other people hadn’t, didn’t mean he couldn’t… Right?

“Yeah, I think… It wouldn’t look too weird in Limbo. But maybe not in the castle…” It was big, really big. All the books would end up covered in the thing if it ended up in the library, he was sure. That’d be a shame, losing all the books and stuff to that thing. Her next question gets a little hum and a nod. “It seems like it? Um… Before he grabbed my friend, I kept thinking something was calling me on the TV? She kept trying to stop me, but I still fell for their trap I guess.” It hadn’t been something he could easily ignore, of course. It was almost like a painful, sharp signal reacting to his head. It drew him in… But he still felt responsible, because he still lost his friend. Now the man in the hat was still after him, and he needed to figure out how to get her back.

“But are they good at helping you with the stuff you need help with?” He asked, thinking about the little imps again… They seemed to be pretty bad at doing stuff Illyana asked them to do from what he’d seen… He’d never had an underling before, so he guessed he didn’t know the first thing about that. Maybe they were good at some stuff, just not stuff outside limbo?

At the warning, he offered one of his tilted little attempts at a smile. “Of course! I promise to remember that, but I still think it’ll be nice.” He responded with a little nod, before he waited as the portals opened under his feet to whisk them away to this location she’d been working on making nicer. The child still gaped a little at the sight that met them. Sure, it was small! But… Small wasn’t bad. Small was cozy, and less daunting… Big places were usually full of scary things, after all. “Wow… You made it all pretty like this?” He edged closer to the yellow flowers curiously. Yellow was his favourite colour… He hadn’t noticed the withering edge in the distance to the garden. Everything was quite pretty here immediately in front of him, after all.

"Anything that wouldn't look too weird in Limbo is probably something one should stay far away from," she said with a quirk of her lips that almost resembled a smile. It was a joke but at the same time there was a disturbing amount of truth to it. Nothing in Limbo was kind or gentle, almost everything was out for power or death. Most often a mix of both. Except perhaps the imps...they were a confusing little group.

"You should be more careful for traps," she shook her head, both at him and at her own comment. He was a child and there was no reason for him to not fall for those at times. How often had she fallen for things when she had first arrived in Limbo? Too often. Far too often. "You will learn. The more difficult the lesson, the more strength you can take from it." That would be the only inspirational speech anyone would ever get from her and it wasn't even that good, was it?

"Who? The imps?" She shrugged. "Certain tasks are well suited for them. Verbal torture of uninvited guests is their specialty. Though I suspect sometimes they use those skills on me." Having to listen to them ask to help with things was pretty much verbal torture. "I have plenty of other underlings that do their jobs without mistakes." Mostly because they were intelligent enough to know she'd just kill them if they failed, but she didn't need to tell Mono that particular tidbit.

"I..." she trailed off as a wave of sadness hit her thinking about the person who had originally made the garden. It'd been so large then, so much more than this shade of a thing she'd managed to create. "I did. Though it was more difficult than I would like to discuss. White magic is...not my specialty. I have ben struggling to recreate the garden of a dear..." friend, the word she was looking for was friend, but she chose something else. "mentor for a very long time. Do you like those flowers?" She almost sounded a bit...hopeful that perhaps she'd done well despite the taint on her soul.

“Yeah, I think that makes sense.” He responded with a little nod. Stuff like that thing was really creepy… Especially since the eyes had always been fixed on him, following his movements from one point to the next as he used the televisions to travel. Though, Mono was pretty sure most stuff in his world wouldn’t look very out of place in Limbo. He wasn’t really sure what to do with that thought… So he tucked it aside for later.

“Yeah, I know… It was really stupid.” He responded with a little shake of his head, though he did tilt his head back up at her… Almost inspiring speech? “I guess you’re right. I let it happen twice, but I know better now!” Which meant he could be more prepared if there was an attempt to lure him in again… Right? “I’m gonna try to get better at stuff, and I’m gonna try to fix my mistake when I go back. I gotta make it up to my friend, and get her back.” added with a serious conviction in his smaller tone.

“Oh, so you got more helpers than the imps?” Well, that made sense considering how confused they seemed to be about doing stuff she asked them. It would be pretty hard to keep a place like this going with help like that… “That’s good, I wouldn’t wanna have to watch over a whole place like this alone if I were you.” There was a weird nagging at the back of his mind when he commented, and he shook his head a little.

Mono glanced up from the flowers at her tone. She sounded so sad… Maybe feelings were weird, but he could at least understand that one. It was hard to think of people who were important to you that were gone. “It’s really amazing that you made it all so nice if white magic isn’t your specialty. Doing something you aren’t good at and having it turn out good is impressive!” The kid added, giving her one of his slightly tilted little attempts at a proper smile. “I bet your mentor would think so too.” Because that’s what mentors were supposed to do… Right? Be proud of you for accomplishing something that was hard.

Looking back at the yellow blooms, his smile was a little more fixed. “Do I? Yeah! They’re really pretty, and bright, and kinda sunny…” Sunny was a happy shade, in his opinion, because… “They make you feel kinda happy to look at, right?”

"Perhaps not stupid..." she put a hand on his shoulder and looked down. "Just the actions of someone young." Young and naïve. There was almost a pat of her that could actually remember how that must have been for herself. But that was another life and perhaps even another her. "With determination like that I believe in you." And that was no lie.

"I rule this entire place," she said with a little quirk of her head. "They all answer to me." As long as she was here that is. The longer she spent away...well, things got a bit more problematic then. Though his comment did manage to stir something inside of her. "They don't help me watch over Limbo. They answer to me." There was a difference. It ultimately meant that she ruled alone. It wasn't as though she had a council to discuss the matters of Limbo with.

"Limbo is shaped by the emotions and desires of it's ruler and yet at the same time it can warp people." The sadness in her tone lingered as she explained. "Creating things like this requires...positivity." Something she wasn't exactly great at. It also required a source of said positivity and she wasn't quite sure where those feelings were even coming from. Her eyes widened at his comment about her mentor though and she looked almost...eager. "Do you think so? Ororo was a difficult teacher. After what I did..." she shook her head and chose to not continue that sentiment.

"Sometimes they do. That was the intention behind them. Happiness is not found in Limbo." Nor did she often experience it.

Mono glanced up at her when she put a hand on his shoulder, maybe a little surprised by it. But… Well, her honestly kind words did make him feel a little better. Because with Illyana… Well, she had always told him things with a particular honesty. Even the less nice stuff, so it made it feel far more genuine than the kind words of some other adults here. “Thanks, Illayana…”

Her explanation of how things worked in Limbo did make him realize he had imagined the whole thing a little differently than it was. “Oh… So they don’t help, but they gotta do what you say?” That was kind of sad, and again the idea of ruling a whole… strange place like this? It was a bit scary, and perhaps made him feel a little sad. Even if he couldn’t really explain why.

“So it’s kinda like a struggle to change it before it changes you?” He asked at the idea that the place was shaped by its ruler. It sounded very complicated… It was hard to linger on that though, as she turned her attention to him with a more eager tone and expression than he’d expected. Had he really said something unexpected? “Yeah? Even if you didn’t do it perfect, or if something happens… Managing to do something you aren’t good at seems better than nothing at all, right? I never really had a real teacher before I got here, because my world is all weird… But since I got here, I guess I learned it’s more normal for them to try to encourage you than to be upset if it’s not perfect.”

Looking back at the flowers again, he carefully reached out to touch the petals. “Well, even if it’s not found here… These definitely make me feel happy to look at. So that’s kinda like a good start, right?”

For some reason him saying thank you just made her feel increasingly awkward and so she decided to just say nothing at all. Why was she so utterly terrible at things like this?

"They help by doing what I say." But did they do it of their own free will? "Some choose to out of respect." Many out of fear and others just because they had no other choice at all. She paused for a moment at his question and looked out at the garden with a strangely sad expression on her fast.

"Yes, exactly like that," she responded with an emotionless tone. It was exactly like that and the struggle got so very tiresome after so many years of doing it. "That's a very...optimistic view of things." As he seemed to usually have. Though, she couldn't really blame him for trying to see things in a brighter way. "Every teacher has their own way of teaching. There were times where my teachers were discouraging and upset," particularly when she had first touched a flower and her corruption had spread to it. "But they meant to make me strong to survive this place."

She looked down at him and gave him a sad little smile. "I suppose it is a good start."

“That must be really hard…” He responded with a small frown and a quieter tone. Mono did not like the sound of that in the least, and it just… hit a certain note that he couldn’t place. He wished he could offer some kind of advice… but what did a kid know, really? Not much, he was sure. He barely understood how the tower’s signal changed and corrupted his world, let alone how Limbo worked. It was… a lot to figure out.

He had to shrug a little, glancing up at Illyana again at her comment. “I dunno if it’s optimistic. It’s just what I noticed since I left my world and people offered to teach me stuff. They all seem pretty nice about things by comparison, and I’m still trying to figure out what’s… normal?” So it was hard to not start to feel a little optimistic about things since leaving his world.

Everyone had made it seem abnormal and strange, so it was a little sad to think maybe it was just… This world and it’s people that were nice teachers, instead of all world’s aside from his. “Guess I still got a lot to learn about how teachers are too.” He added as Illyana explained how some could be discouraging or get upset… She was really strong though, or seemed like it. Meaning for a student to survive was perhaps a big difference from those who might want the opposite.

At her sad smile, Mono nodded quickly. “Yeah, and starts mean more stuff will happen eventually. Do you know what you want to do next?”

"Life is hard." It was a cold statement, much colder than anything else she had said to him recently. Yet it was the truth, at least it was her truth. Life was hard and it required sacrifice and struggle. Those were the two biggest things she never seemed to be able to escape from in her life and it left her so terribly tired. Not that she would outwardly admit to that overall feeling of exhaustion. To admit that would be to admit weakness and Limbo had taught her to never show weakness.

"Ah...that..." she trailed off and shifted from one foot to another in an almost awkward way. "That is something I understand. I am still trying to figure out what is normal myself. How to be a real girl I suppose you could say." That was what Pixie had called it and it was fitting enough. After all prior to regaining the pieces of her soul she wasn't really the real version of herself. Sometimes she still wondered if she was or if she had any right to even think about that after all she'd done. How strange it was to find a common ground like this with such a young boy. "It can be difficult, can't it? Especially when everyone around seems to make it look so easy." As if normal just came naturally to them. It could almost make someone feel a bit resentful.

She took a pause to look out at the small garden and then shook her head. "No. I wanted to recreate what it looked like so long ago but...I can't quite remember anymore." Which was quite the sad thought to have for her. "What would you do?"

“Yeah…” A cold statement… But Mono knew it was true, even if things were a lot easier since leaving his world. One day he’d go back and it certainly would be as it was when he left it… So it was… Sad to know someone else saw things like that, and that Illyana had been there… But part of why he felt comfortable around her was that she understood things and did not sugar coat them just because he was a child. Enough adults told him how things should be. They never liked to consider how it actually was.

Listening to her continue, he nodded along. If she was still having trouble figuring it out now… Well, he wondered how long it would take him? He tried to listen, to adapt to those around them… But it always felt a little off, and perhaps a bit fake… He didn’t want to be fake… It reminded him of the porcelain bullies. Always trying to mimic the behavior of real children (albeit misbehaving ones), but always… seeming not quite right. Not that they had anyone ‘normal’ to interact with, either. “It can be! And… It kinda makes you feel weird when they make it seem easy, but you can’t figure it out? At least… I can’t. I just try to not say weird stuff. If I see them react to something I say or do like it’s weird or sad, I just try not to again?”

Mono tapped his little chin thoughtfully to the question, “Maybe that’s ‘cause you gotta make it your own? Even if you recreate it, you should make it full of stuff that’s nice that you like. Otherwise it’s just a copy.” He wasn’t sure what he’d do though… Was there a wrong answer? “I dunno though, I guess I’d make more flowers in happy colours…? Oh! And maybe some more nice trees, they’re good for climbing or sitting under… Places to sit and relax to admire what pretty stuff there is seems kinda important in gardens I saw when I got here.” He looked up at Ilyana expectantly, possibly wondering if he’d answered well.

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When the wolves wear the wool

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