brotherofagod: (Default)
Jacob 'Jake' Miller ([personal profile] brotherofagod) wrote in [community profile] aterat2021-01-15 01:58 pm

A serious talk [Closed]

Who; Jacob Miller & Yuki Sohma.
What; Step 1 - apologizing for being an ass.
Where; Mage Tower.
When; January 13th-ish.
Warnings; None yet.


Jacob had no idea how he was going to start the conversation but he had taken Nida's advice to heart. He had a small bag of sweets in one hand and a cup of tea in the other. It wasn't cold anymore but he knew that Yuki didn't drink alcohol and he wasn't sure what else he could bring him. Then again, the tea might not have gotten so cold if Jacob had known where to find him.

He didn't want to call him because that felt too impersonal, so he began to look for Yuki the old fashion way... or you could call it the stalker way but Jake was trying his best to stay positive. He swung by a few places that the young man had hung out before finally making his way to the Mage Tower. Yuki had been looking for books about this worlds plant life the last time he'd been here and since Jake couldn't find the elusive man anywhere else, he hoped that he'd find Yuki searching for more books within its walls.

He was quiet when he stepped inside, his pale blue eyes glancing around the main entrance. He wasn't just going to peek his head in and leave. He had to look around and see if Yuki was actually here. He also couldn't shout, it was a library or at least a tower with a lot of books that Jake treated as a library.

After ten minutes of searching he found Yuki sitting on the floor near one of the bookshelves. There was a small pile of books at his side but this felt wrong. This wasn't the right section for information on plants.

He cleared his throat and slowly approached Yuki, his mouth went dry and for a long awkward 10 seconds he had forgotten what he was going to say. "Hey." He whispered lamely. "Can I talk to you for a second?" That was the lamest thing ever but it was at least a start...
areasontohope: (Looking up (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-15 07:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Yuki had talked to no one but he'd seen people looking at him at the office when he went in every day. He knew they wanted to ask questions but no one had approached him so if it got too overwhelming he went to the bathroom and tried to be silent about crying. And his heart had lurched every time someone opened the Gullwing's office door.

But when he had a day off he headed to the Tower and researched everything he could find about going home. The pile of books on the floor had grown considerably as his intention had been just one or two. But now there were at least six there, with him looking through another one.

Sleeping had been tough, and he needed to break down and ask one of the Aspects. That was planned to try and locate them tomorrow because he just had so much silence. Sure he'd thought of looking for Jacob but the man had left him, which should tell Yuki plenty right there.

But he heard someone approaching and his back had stiffened. And then he swore he was hearing things because the voice sounded like it belonged to Jacob, but that couldn't be. So if his mind was indeed playing tricks on him, he would turn and face who it was.

Grey eyes turned to the sound of that voice and he immediately froze. The confusion started all over again and he wasn't about to cause a scene even if there weren't many people here. He felt like he was made of water and stood slowly keeping his voice hushed.

"What are you doing with a tea cup in your hand?"
areasontohope: (Just don't)

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-15 07:45 pm (UTC)(link)
He accepted the gifts without complaint but really looked at Jacob. Had the other lost his mind? Why..nevermind. And then it felt like a boulder had dropped on him as Jacob mentioned..that.

The grey eyes closed and he was grateful that he had the tea cup and candy to hold onto. The silver head shook and the eyes opened back up again and he looked into those eyes a moment before looking at the floor. "Just tell me what I did wrong. Did I make you scared? Is that why you left?" That was the only thing that had been going around and around in his head, that he'd done something so irrevocable that Jacob felt as if his only option had been to just up and abandon him.

And he'd stopped there because he could hear that he was going to be upset and possibly cry all over again, which was something he really didn't want to do in front of Jacob.
areasontohope: (Those eyes (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-15 08:26 pm (UTC)(link)
He let out a small sigh at hearing this wasn't his fault and he took in a shaky breath. But he looked at Jacob with confusion when he was taking the blame. How could he do that when he up and left? None of this made any sense to him at all and it felt like it was just getting worse.

The silver head cocked to the side after he placed the tea and candy down on a nearby table so that he could listen and grey eyes noticed the other's face go red. Yuki recalled rather vividly what he'd felt before Jacob had scrambled. But he wasn't going to say anything or bring it up right now.

Waiting for an explanation, it didn't seem as if he was going to get one, so Yuki tried to gently pry without touching the other though he really wanted to. "You felt..?"
areasontohope: (Speechless (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-15 09:06 pm (UTC)(link)
Yuki really wasn't sure what was going on in the other's head at this point. The moments turned into what felt like forever and more worry knotted in his stomach though he fought not to show it. Jacob had remained silent for what seemed like a very long time but then suddenly he moved.

He then found himself pressed up against the other's chest which reminded him of the night they danced. Grey eyes went wide wondering what exactly was going on and half thought to push the other back because he wasn't going to be told again that he wasn't wanted. But then he discovered the hand on his cheek and he didn't know what to make of such a tender gesture. Confusion and the threat of tears came first and foremost though so he'd still been about to pull away. He wasn't playing games here and he would knock this boy through stacks of books like he'd done to that stupid cat if that's what it took to get his point across.

But then warmth kindly and tenderly covered his mouth albeit a little harshly at first. His breath had felt as if it had been snatched away by some unknown force and he silently obeyed it without another coherent thought. Still, he did notice that all of the tension left his body and Yuki clumsily just tried to copy the movements he felt. Nothing in this exchange gave him much time to think anything though there would definitely be questions after. So while he could, his own hands gently reached up to touch Jacob's face, to tell him that this was alright to do.

And when the other pulled away, reason returned slowly and he found himself blinking up at the other almost dreamily. His hands came down slowly too almost as if they'd touched something they really shouldn't have. So when his voice returned, grey eyes looked down, as if he should be ashamed that he went along with the other's plan. However, the gaze soon returned to Jacob's face. "Is that what this was all about?"
Edited 2021-01-15 21:10 (UTC)
areasontohope: (Listening (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-15 09:41 pm (UTC)(link)
It was weird to kiss a man but he'd been attracted to Hatsuharu. He just had never taken the Ox seriously because he had Rin and Yuki wasn't going to be anyone's 'side snack' or whatever they were called. Boys had a crush on him because he looked like a girl. The crushes themselves didn't bother him unless it was to picture him in feminine clothing.

Fortunately they were in a pretty secluded part of the library so it wasn't as if someone could sneak up on them easily. So the kiss and ensuing conversation were guaranteed quite a lot of privacy. Which was good too because Yuki could feel the tenderness in the way Jacob was holding him now.

He went to say that of course he figured it out with the physical demonstration at the Ball, but that would've been very rude. He listened and nodded sympathetically, knowing a lot of the boys at school had trouble admitting they were gay too as it wasn't exactly socially considered normal or acceptable. However, Yuki had a good role model for acceptance in Haru. "It's not okay for guys to like other guys where you're from?" This was him trying to understand things more from Jacob's perspective, to get an idea as to why the other had thought it was so wrong.

A small smile came out at the apology though. "You seem to have told me how you felt without using words." And then he noticed he was let go of which made his body internally whine. It had been comfortable and was even enjoying it much to his own horror, but space was good because it allowed him to think.

The silver head then shook. "It's okay as long as you don't do it again."
areasontohope: (Yes)

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-15 10:37 pm (UTC)(link)
"That..makes sense." He'd seen crosses on a few students and knew a little bit about their religion. But it wasn't his growing up because his God was incarnate and..well there was so much baggage to unpack about that. But that wasn't important right now. Taking a steadying breath, he looked into Jacob's eyes. "It makes sense why you were so scared now."

Grey eyes slightly narrowed at Jacob's offer not to run and he waited to hear what was going to be said. But the serious face gave way to a soft look. "I never said that. But I really don't want a repeat of what happened even if I understand what happened." And whether or not he personally wanted to make a go of it had occurred to him, judging of course with the events that had happened prior to the knock down and a little bit after.

"So it really doesn't make any sense to rush into anything if being attracted to guys is still so new to you." Plus a part of him was still scared that Jacob might change his mind and decide that how he grew up was more important than him. So they both needed time and Yuki could recall vividly how devastating it had felt to have Haru just walk away as he did saying it was a good fight. And he hoped Machi had found someone else too, because it would be horribly and utterly selfish for him to hold out hope that she would wait for him.
areasontohope: (Good)

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-15 11:26 pm (UTC)(link)
He was definitely listening and wanted to reach out. But he was still shy and was new to the idea of actually getting to date a guy. It did make him happy that Jacob was okay with slow though.

The date request got a surprised reaction out of him but really, they were both here. And with the 'some time' he wasn't sure whether the other actually wanted a date sooner than whenever 'some time' was. "Well if you haven't eaten today, maybe we could go out for dinner?" Yuki told himself he was okay with it if Jacob said no though he really hoped that wasn't the case here. He'd spent way too long with all of this alone.

"I can clean up my books and we can go, but if it's too soon..or you have things you need to look up too, that's okay." He didn't want to seem to eager but he didn't want to make it seem like they should wait forever in order to have a date. Did dancing at the Ball count as a date? Maybe not since it had ended so badly.
areasontohope: (Content face)

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-16 12:28 am (UTC)(link)
Stalkers weren't uncommon to Yuki with his legion of fangirls believing that he was a prince. And due to what had happened between them Yuki was actually touched that Jacob had gone through all of the trouble that he had to try to make things right between them.

"That must've taken a lot of effort." And now he knelt and started to clean up his book pile, putting them back on the shelves to try and get them both out of there. This was weird as his mind scrambled to put a label to this. It had taken him a long time to date Machi but that was because of a certain complication of turning into a Rat. And it wasn't until that he was really serious about her that he had gone to talk to her about it.

Then he ended up here and had been here a few months. In that time Jacob had been a constant and Yuki always found himself looking forward to spending time with the man. Maybe he too had developed some sort of feelings that had gone unacknowledged. Maybe he would bring that up later, but he had to get this done first.
areasontohope: (Bad habit (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-16 12:44 am (UTC)(link)
He couldn't help the smile that formed on his face when Jacob knelt to help him even if he was embarrassed now as to what the topics were about. But those thoughts were replaced by the man's nearness and the herb garden. It was very sweet of him and he wasn't sure how to express it properly so he thought of something else. "Was it easy to start? Is it growing okay?"

But then the topic of the books came up and he shook his head. He didn't want to keep secrets like this because he knew it wasn't healthy. "I was looking for a way to go home." The smile had come off of his face and he finished putting the last ones away. It didn't make him happy to admit it, but at the same time what was the point in being anywhere if he didn't matter.

And that was how hard he'd taken this.
areasontohope: (All the smiling (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-16 01:09 am (UTC)(link)
The silver head lowered and he didn't move after Jacob asked his question because now he felt guilty about it. So his voice came out in a low whisper as his shoulders slumped defeatedly. "No."

But then Jacob's smile made him feel so much better about everything as he listened to the story about the garden. "I can take a look at them for you." It would make him really happy to be able to help the man out but he didn't want to try and make the other give him a day to come over so he just stayed quiet.

The smile then came back out even if it was a gentler one as he looked up at the handsome man beside him. "We can look for some cookbooks if you want to since we're here anyway." He only offered because he heard the word try. Was that the man's way of trying to repay the gardening thing, or was Jacob trying in his way to take care of him?

Either way, Yuki felt like his heart was melting.
areasontohope: (Words escape (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-16 02:32 am (UTC)(link)
He smiled at the not being good at surprises part and listened as Jacob came up with a plan. Reaching his hand up he then tucked a strand of silver up behind his ear and just smiled. "That sounds like a good plan."

And after every last book was away, he stood up and picked up the cup and candy. That was when he heard the part about walking him home. Yuki couldn't help it as he turned to look at the other, his grey eyes were just so focused and fixed on that face. The offer was really just so touchingly sweet and protective that he couldn't find a voice for a few moments. But when he did, the tone was hushed and full of wonder.

"You..want to walk me home?"
areasontohope: (If that's what you'd like to do (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-19 01:05 am (UTC)(link)
There was just something in the sincerity of Jacob's tone that had Yuki simply stop and watch the other's movements as he stood. And to it he couldn't help but give a small smile. It was very thoughtful that the other would offer do such a thing even if it was completely unnecessary in his own mind.

A blush then spread across his face and he turned away before it could get too bad. "No, I won't get tired of you." It was really more like he wouldn't ever, but he couldn't say that because that would be too much. He turned back around once he was sure his face was under control and again the sincerity of Jacob's tone hit him about not running away which left him speechless.

There were still so many questions but he couldn't bring himself to ask them. What did this make them with going to dinner and being walked home? What did they do now? Did Jacob want to hold hands? A sigh came out and his head just swam with unanswered questions.

So for now Yuki followed mutely behind.
areasontohope: (Gentle concern (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-19 02:11 am (UTC)(link)
Feeling himself curl up inside of himself at being so nervous, Yuki fought not to show it at least. So he just smiled which actually turned into a shy laugh at Jacob's words about not biting. That gave him the little push needed in order to walk beside the other. And his mind wondered at that whole biting comment which caused him to hide his face for a bit as it mentally worked out what that would be like.

It was so weird. Of all of the things he could picture happening in his place, something like this was nowhere on that list nor would it ever have been really. And the silver haired head turned towards Jacob as he talked about where they were going to eat. So of course that in turn had him ask a question or two.

"You've been there already? What kind of food do they have?"
areasontohope: (Discuss (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-19 08:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Jacob had a really nice smile and Yuki turned his head away unless he wanted to get caught staring. So he walked alongside and let his thoughts tumble around in his head, not really in search of any answers. The finger food sounded fine and he nodded about the work thing. The other must've met so many different people that way.

But he stopped at hearing the 'someone special' thing. And Jacob had just kept walking so he hurried to get where the other was. "A tea room." Yuki whispered. He then looked up at Jacob.

"They have these at home though I can't say I've been to one."
areasontohope: (Gentle concern (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-20 09:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Yuki had been thinking of future too, and now he really wished he had spoken to the Aspects. This was all new to him too and he wanted to not make any mistakes and scare the other off again so brave faces would go on although deep down he was scared and worried. But he tried to push those thoughts out of his mind and concentrate on Jacob's words regarding the place.

The woman behind the counter seemed nice but he wasn't sure what to do when those eyes became focused on him. Still, he just smiled politely and the two were brought soon enough to a table to be seated. He didn't know what to expect but the atmosphere seemed pretty nice and laid back.

The place didn't seem very busy at the moment so he was fine with that. And he just kept a smile. "How long ago did you do construction on this place?"
areasontohope: (Content (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-23 05:19 am (UTC)(link)
"Oh." Well there went the one gambit of conversation that he had. The rest of his mind kind of blanked because the lady came in and backed up Jacob's story though it wasn't as if he didn't believe the man. So he just smiled from her to the blonde.

Conversation seemed awkward so as Yuki prepared to stare at the menu, his eyes met the other's. Something seemed to change and make the other more relaxed suddenly and he silently wondered at the change. But he didn't bring it up and just nodded to the gratitude. "It seems really nice here, it's kind of relaxing."

He really wanted to ask if there was something wrong, but he was half afraid of what the answer would be so he didn't.
areasontohope: (Slight faith)

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-01-29 10:45 am (UTC)(link)
Yuki had to smile at Jacob's awkward laugh because it was adorable. But it might be impolite to say such a thing so he didn't. "I can imagine it's better to not be working and being able to relax."

His silver head canted to the side slightly as the other went on about how it was less awkward with sitting down and he nodded. Hopefully his own nervousness wasn't showing as he was trying to tell himself it was just two people out on a date that other people did all of the time. Yuki was looking for ways to ground himself and not make a big deal out of this because he had done that with the Ball and their private dance. And that had ended pretty badly.

"Well it's not something as formal as dinner, so this would be a better place for a date." He didn't want to term it 'first date' because maybe that was too much pressure. But he could help with the teas that Jacob seemed to be puzzling over so he smiled. "We drink green tea back home, and they have it here so we can do that."
areasontohope: (If you would listen)

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-02-09 11:04 am (UTC)(link)
"Well I've heard that working too much isn't a good thing." He hadn't had to work back home with having an allowance for being the Rat of the zodiac. Plus his family's fortune and good name had allowed him to get into college without any issues though he had to do all of the work to maintain it on his own. But it put Miss Honda in mind because she worked real hard.

And he wasn't quite sure what to make of Jacob scooting closer but he didn't mind. They were on a date of sorts so getting closer to each other would be a normal thing, right? So he tried to tilt the menu a little more so that it silently encouraged the other as well as letting him non verbally know the closeness was comfortable and accepted even if why he was being looked at was a bit confusing. "I wouldn't know about favourite because there's just so many different teas. There's Blueberry, Strawberry.."

And that's when his voice stopped at feeling Jacob's leg touch his. He sucked in a breath and tried to act normal. Once he regained some breathing skill, he realized the older woman was coming over.

Act normal, act normal, act normal.
areasontohope: (Did you need something?)

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-02-10 01:13 am (UTC)(link)
Grey eyes looked to Jacob wondering where he'd suddenly gotten the ideas for everything that he ordered. He didn't ask any questions though and wasn't about to with the older lady standing there. So he just nodded and smiled along because it seemed like it was the best thing to do.

Once she was gone Yuki suddenly felt very alone with Jacob. It wasn't a bad thing, it was just different. So he looked over at the other and had no idea what the other was even talking about. But the only thing that came to mind was the food order because he hadn't consulted with him though that was fine in itself because he had truthfully been a little lost with all of it.

"Yes, it's fine."

And while he was fine with it there was still the mental flailing that he found himself doing. Why had the other moved closer to him? Not that it was a problem, it was just his curiosity getting the better of him here. Should he ask if something was wrong?
areasontohope: (Content face)

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-02-10 01:38 am (UTC)(link)
Yuki's face turned slightly red. "I've never been on a real date before." It was embarrassing to admit but he and Machi hadn't gotten to that point. Sure he'd bought and given her stuff and she'd bought him a bag of fertilizer for his plants but the curse stayed in the way of all of that. There was the date he went on with Miss Honda but that really wasn't a real date because Kyo had been in tow with Kagura.

As far as family went, he wasn't too keen to discuss the Sohmas. But he supposed that he could at least say he had parents and a brother and of course lots of cousins. He wouldn't dream of getting into the family curse or anything like that, but he could mention a few things here and there. And he didn't think discussing family wealth was important either because that would just lead to more questions.

The tea and sandwiches came really fast and suddenly there were weird barriers. But Yuki was the first to reach out and move them because he was sure the lady hadn't meant to place them there.

"Didn't you tell me you had a sister?" He figured he'd start there because talking about Jacob's family seemed safer.
areasontohope: (Genuine slight smile (r))

[personal profile] areasontohope 2021-02-10 02:41 am (UTC)(link)
"So you lived in the United States." Yuki replied. Well it wasn't unusual to have exchange students come to the high school and then college from there. And then as he smiled about the tea being poured for him there went the question about siblings. Well it was a fair question.

"My brother Ayame is older by ten years. And he's the only sibling I have." This information was true and it was interesting to have to talk about the Snake as such. But should the elder sibling appear (which he severely hoped not) then at least knowing who he was wouldn't be a shock.

The very outgoing personality and complete opposite of Yuki would more than likely be a shock however.

He debated on a few of the things to snack on since never having never tried them before, but politely he took some to put on his plate. "Did you move to Seattle for school or just because she was on the other coast?"